New York Jizz Department

My mind races, my pulse races, I can not slow down on the inside. Until we shall actually sit down to be Physically/Emotionally Vulnerable with each other, I will keep on asking myself: "Am I Good Enough To Please Her? Will I Be Good Enough, To Please Her?" I do not know, I am not sure, my senses are clouded, tunneled, siphoned, by certain Psychological Blocks, that tell me to Keep On Pushing, Don't Stop For Emotion, Feel No Emotion, Keep On Pushing, On We Plow. Guaranteed, that as soon as we shall come together, and settle down, set the mood, set the ambiance, just The Two Of Us, Alone, my mind will stop racing, my vitals will stop racing, I will start to come back down, The Non-Civilian Me, will gently melt away, Warzone sensations will fade, become faint, muted, no longer Reality. The Non-Civilian Me, will gently melt away, slowly, softly, delicately, and then will I realize, just how Vulnerable I now am, with Her. What an amazing feeling that will be,...to b...

I work every day, towards eventually being able to Host others at my new living space. A Dream, for several years in my deepest thoughts. To Welcome The Good Company, into my Sacred Space, Hallowed Grounds, to make myself Vulnerable, Accessible, Open, and to allow my Company to feel similarly, at ease, at peace, as he, she, they, shall venture more deeply into my Sacred Space. Once closed-off to The Entire World, shuttered, dead, thoughts of the place where nothing grows, where dreams go to Die. I want to welcome Those Good People, Those Special Individuals, gently, deeply into my Sanctuary. Let them see the remnants of what was once an Empty Shell, now seedlings sprout through the rocks and the cracks, rebirth and renewal.